Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Randomize
