I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
