They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
