We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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