the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize
