you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
