rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
