I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize