so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
