I showed him my bush... on skype.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
