you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Welp...herpes.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
You may now shotgun with the bride
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
