Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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