I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
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