He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
