Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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