if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
