i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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