this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
