The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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