Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I didn't notice because vodka
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
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