What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
