how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I am one with the molecules
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize