have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
she peed on how many people?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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