Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Randomize
