I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize