so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize
