That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
