she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
