You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize