Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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