Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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