i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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