so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
