yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
she was so not down for the gang bang
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
