so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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