the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
