She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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