ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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