It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
