That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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