Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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