dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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