Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize