If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
