Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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