are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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