I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
