Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize