So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
