if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize