Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
